We’ve officially crossed over into crazy town. Sixers in 7 sign guy has upended my life and I’m yelling at people trying to paste this conspiracy together like Charlie shouting “Pepe Silvia” in the mailroom because no one will listen to me. Sixers in 7 guy has been an inside job from the start!

Somehow the Simp gets tickets and Mark in Philly’s girlfriend who the city rallied behind a week before this marketing scheme gets left in the dust. I detailed the reason why I hate “Sixers in 7” guy here yesterday and why it’s a rallying cry for losers.

Championing the phrase “Sixers in 7” is losers mentality. Did people forget we’re the #1 seed? It was title or bust last week now we’re rallying behind Sixers in 7? Against a 4 seed? As -335 favorites coming into the series. We just had two of the worst collapses in franchise history in back to back games! One being at home. Ben Simmons’ future could be decided by what happens tomorrow! And then this kid takes a picture in front of the Rocky statue which is THE symbol of an underdog in Philly and now I want to puke. WE ARE THE #1 SEED! If this was in Utah or Boston we’d be making fun of this guy forever. And there are actually people rallying behind this guy. Its a war cry for LOSERS! For cowards! For people who were raised by fathers who played JV as seniors and mothers who complained their children didn’t get a trophy at the end of the season in Little League! If these people led us during the American Revolution we’d still be speaking British! This kid is getting tickets from the Sixers for Game 7. And Mark in Philly’s girlfriend who was on a streak for the ages couldn’t even get a leftover free t-shirt and a coupon for a Lorenzos slice. She teaches the blind for gods sake! What has Sixers in 7 kid done? When the Sixers needed them the most Mark and his girlfriend were always there.

They were there at Game 2 against the Hawks to get the Sixers back on track.

Then after the Sixers embarrassed the fanbase Mark spends like $500 for two tickets to right the ship because the Sixers needed a miracle. What do they do? Squander a 25 point lead at home and ruin the streak.

All this time it’s been going on and they don’t hear from the Sixers ONCE! But Kyle Sixers in 7 guy went viral. Maybe the Sixers didn’t see Mark’s tweet. No fucking chance. Mark did 700+ RTs and 11k likes just on the first post. Combined with the absolute numbers he was doing every time he tweeted they were going after. People were tagging Scott O’Neill and Chris Heck. They’re tagging Ben Simmons, Embiid, and the Sixers. Mark hears fucking ZERO from the team. The Sixers tell him to kick rocks. The Sixers in 7 guy got 700 RTs & 4k likes. You don’t need to be a social media manager to know one did better than the other. If you think the Sixers never saw Mark’s tweet I’ve got beachfront property in Iowa I want to sell you.

Maybe the Sixers didn’t think they could verify Mark’s story? I think the team with a StubHub logo stitched on their jerseys probably wouldn’t have a hard time verifying it. Chris Heck could’ve even done a collab between the girlfriend and StubHub so he could’ve gotten some precious brand dollars out of it. Something fishy is going on. Chris Heck quote tweets sign guy with his stupid hashtag #OnBrand he’s been using since him and Scott O’Neill refused to address the “Trust The Process” slogan before they made Joel Embiid adopt the nickname so they could trademark the phrase and make millions off of it. This is Chris Heck to a tee. Always calculated. Always manipulative. How are we going to sell more Boathouse Row jerseys? How do we generate some positivity around another playoff run where the team fell short? Stick a choir boy on Broad Street with a sign and hope none of the priests at Arch and Broad try to kidnap him. If Sixers in 7 guy has an ounce of decency he’d give up his tickets to Mark and his girlfriend.